Sometimes you meet a guy, and there is an instant flash of desire. It is obvious when he feels it too. But, you’re just getting over a heartbreak, or your schedule does not permit time for dating, or you just do not want to be in a relationship right now. It doesn’t mean you don’t want sex! And here is this hot guy, right in front of you, making your thoughts wander, and your juices flow.
You have options. You can ignore his kissable lips, and the tight tug of desire you feel between your legs. You can flirt, and nothing more, satisfied simply by knowing you are still desirable. You can tease him (and yourself), and indulge in some heavy making out – in a secluded corner of whatever location you find yourselves in, or maybe even in your car. Any of these choices will surely lead to a satisfying encounter with your vibrator when you get home.
There is, however, another, better option: Invite him to your bed or accept an invitation to his. Get a hotel room if there is one close by. One night stands are so hot, so sexy, so satisfying! You are under no obligation to do anything except enjoy yourself. Sex without emotional and attachment expectations allows you to be free and open with your sexuality, and to be as little or as much of yourself as you want.
While mutual pleasure is the goal, there are no requirements when you hook up like this. Don’t feel like giving him a blowjob? Don’t. Want to be on top? Push him back on the bed and ride him to a mind blowing orgasm. Only keep in mind, that it is the same for him, so he may not go down on you, and he will want to take you from behind (don’t they always?), but it’s fine. This is not true love, the only commitment is pleasure. He’s not going start or end the evening by saying, “You never wear a garter,” because it isn’t a relevant statement.
When it’s over, send him home, or dress and leave. No need to worry about drooling while you sleep, nor be disturbed by snoring. No awkward morning moments worrying about smeared mascara, morning breath, or whether or not you pee too loud. On the other hand, you don’t really have to worry about any of that if you choose not to. If you both think it would be great to wake up together and do it again, by all means, go for it. You can even cook him breakfast before sending him on his way. If you want.
That’s the point. The liaison is a series of choices you make, with none of the compromise or considerations you have to make when navigating the dating, leading to a relationship path. Because really, who cares? The plan is to never see him again anyway.
Do not, under any circumstances, expect him to call you and ask you out to dinner. Think very carefully about how you respond if he asks for your number. Sometimes the sex is so good, and the euphoric afterglow is so pleasant, that your initial reaction is a desire to recreate the experience. Remember why you did this in the first place. The second you give him your phone number, you are creating an expectation. What if he doesn’t call you? What if, later in the day, you realize what you wanted is what you wanted – last night. You may well be completely happy to leave things just as they are.
It is not impossible to have a string of hot, sexy nights in the same vein, but there is risk involved. Preparing for such an encounter can begin to feel a lot like dating. The initial thrill was that there was no preparation – it just happened. These passionate moments cannot be orchestrated. Spontaneity is the key.
Everyone likes good sex! I’m not suggesting that you should rule out a repeat performance as a matter of course. Just be sure you both know what you expect / want / need out of any further meetings. At this point, there is an obligation – that you be honest with him, and with yourself, about what you are doing, thinking, and feeling. He needs to be forthcoming, as well.
Sometimes, one night of unbridled passion is exactly what you need. A lust filled connection, that leaves you smiling and feeling sexy is good for your ego. It’s probably good for his, too, but who cares? This was for you.
WARNING! One night stands are not for everyone. Some people need an emotional connection and/or a relationship to be comfortable getting naked and intimate. You want to feel good, happy and satisfied after the impromptu bout of hot sex with a stranger. If you think you would be uncomfortable, or think it would cause you any guilt or shame, don’t do it! There is absolutely nothing wrong with your vibrator.